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July 13, 2008
belated spousal appreciation
I've been working pretty heavily since my paternity leave ran out exactly a month ago, and despite working from home a day or two a week since, can't say that I've had nearly as much 1:1:1 time with Des and Devin as I did then. Given he was pretty much an adorable little red-haired lump of clay at that time, a lot's changed since then.
And I'm basically writing this post in admiration for the work my wife's put in since then. The reason it's delayed is that I haven't been able to see the fruits of her labor until now. Now sure, I've helped indirectly with most all of these items, but she's the one that really put the hours in, and it's very obvious now.
- Vocabulary: although Devin's got about 6 words he uses regularly now (Mom, Dad, Cat, Ball, Baby, and of course No), he's got at least 25 signs that he uses even more frequently, and I'm only just starting to realize it. My friend Julie extolled the virtues of teaching babies sign language early, and although I was always on board philosophically, it's one of those parental tasks that takes a LONG time to glean results. When Devin busted his first sign on me a couple months ago (Milk), it came out of the blue, but was absolutely, positively communication. Since then, he's been springing out with a few new ones every week, and starting to put them together into 'micro-sentences' (i.e. more + food + please). The part that's blowing me away right now is the fact that he'd been using many of his new signs for a while before we realized it. Fine motor skills and precision are not a 1-year old's strong suit, so many of the signs he was taught came back to us in a slightly modified if not exaggerated form. However, now that he knows it's an effective way to 'talk' with us, he makes sure to let us know when he's telling us something and we're not getting it. If Des wasn't so consistent in always using signs for key words along with her verbal communication, I'm reasonably sure he wouldn't be so overflowing in 'speech' right now. It's just plain awesome!
- Fine Motor Skills: I'm pretty much the 'read a story' guy, and the 'crawl around and chase each other' guy. I made a comment to Des a few months back that I was wondering when he'd finally start using his stacking blocks and such, and she started setting two parts of the day aside (without me realizing it) to play with him in that regard. When she opens a bottle, she hands him the cap and lets him put it back on. When she needs something picked up from the floor, she asks him to please get it for her, and he's all over it. I didn't realize how well this was working until today, when he picked up a water bottle cap I dropped, got mad when I didn't put it back on, and then proceeded to pick it back up from the end table and place it solidly on my water bottle. This is now manifesting itself with him actually cleaning up after himself, and placing toys back in the basket when he's done playing. Again, amazing. The real-world tasks have apparently not just strengthened his motor skills, but his independence and responsibility, as he often now follows after US and picks things up that have been left behind.
I suppose I'm writing this as I feel a bit like an absent dad in parts of the process, but am now incredibly impressed with how well Des' work and parenting has paid off while I've been bringing home the mortgage payment. The pivotal moment was today when he was making odd gestures at me and I had to be told that he was actually talking to me - in this particular case telling me about his stuffed bear, and I just thought he was scratching his chest.
Looks like I've got a lot of catching up to do, and appreciation to give. This really is a learning experience for everyone involved, and one I'm humbled daily to be a part of.
Posted by Scott at July 13, 2008 4:57 PM